Mystical Pedo Van Filled w/ Kidnapped Squids

Mystical Pedo Van Filled w/ Kidnapped Squids

Master Squid was taking a NJ Transit bus in order to go home after working at a hot dog stand all day long for minimum pay. He was extremely tired and fell asleep immediately. A loud scrooping sound woke him and he noticed that he missed his stop. Now, Master Squid was very fustrated. He yelled into the ear of a very old lady that was sitting next to him. "Jesus Christ, where the rice?!" the poor old lady yelled.
"The rice is located in the Czech Republic in the town of Buřenice. Do you wish for me to accompany you there? You seem like you need some help since you're so old."
The poor old lady was offended by this comment and slammed her purse into his face. Master Squid was incredibly upset now. He missed his stop and now his siphon hurt. Master Squid cried as he looked longingly out the window. An object catched his attention as he looked out the window. It was a large, black van. It looked very suspicious to him. And so he teleported out of the bus with his magical powers and landed on top of the van. He licked the metal and said "This is a mystical pedo van blessed by the evil •|• || !¡ : , who also happens to be the brother of the mystical ㅓ:ㄱ! I must save the poor squids trapped in this vile vehicle!" 

(Galactic Language)

And so Master Squid, using his magical squid powers, manuevered the van and crashed it into a telephone pole. And that was when •|• || !¡ : appeared. Master Squid gasped as •|• || !¡ : showed his face. It was so hideous that Master Squid used his long tentacles to squeeze •|• || !¡ : to death. The van poofed and disappeared, leaving the young squids free of their impeding doom. Master Squid had saved the day again!

THE END